Dynamics From House to Home

 A party is being organised at  Khanna Club. The theme of discussion at the party is house/home.

Ms Jyoti-Hello friends, it is pouring heavily outside. I am pleased to see members of our club have come on time. The theme of our discussion at the party today is House/Home. As we don’t have much time on hand, and each member of our club has some other commitment to meet. Therefore, I request every respectable member to speak about their view, enlightening the theme. I request Ms Gita to summarise the contents of all members of the club and conclude about the theme, and if possible, give her own opinion about the theme.

Ms Joshi-I live in a very big traditional type of bungalow. I have two caretakers, due to the ongoing pandemic, they take all precautions like social distancing to organise my balconies, rooms and garages. Sometimes I feel life is still very messy in this house. I wish to request other members of the club to give me some valuable tips to make my house to home.

Ms Gracy-I live in a duplex house. We have a lovely terrace where we have planted many lovely seasonal plants. It is difficult to go up and down very often. So we have to plan our activities with respect to the constraint. In spite of all my positive efforts and precautions taken, like maintaining social distance, wearing a mask, etc, due to the pandemic some sometimes life seems to be messy in my duplex house. Valuable comments and tips from respected members will mean so much to me.

Ms Sita-I live in 3 bed 3-bedroom flat in a big posh society, where there is a big swimming pool. A beautiful garden in the centre of society and a neat walking path for every member to walk on is a big facility for us. There is no security problem. Due to the ongoing pandemic, I take all precautions, yet I sometimes feel suffocated in my flat. Valuable suggestions from respected members to make my house to home are blessings for me.

Ms Shabana- I  live near river riverfront over a small hill. My house is moderately big. A scene from my house window is a treat to the eyes. There is a power cut of electricity sometimes. In the rainy season, sometimes the river overflows, and sometimes a feeling of uncertainty remains with us for an hour or two in the house.  There is NO problem with the availability of drinking water also. We solve all problems from time to time in the pandemic, yet the house becomes messy. Friends, I request you to kindly give me some suggestions to make my house to home.

Ms Gita-Friends, I have been asked to conclude the discussion by Ms. Joshi. Friends, I live in a very ordinary house which is in the outer skirts of the city. I have a little garden which is being taken care of by myself and members of my family as and when we get time. As I am a writer-poetess, I am not able to fetch a big salary. I take help from house housekeeper once a week only. In the ongoing pandemic, I have been enjoying my life by writing. I feel twice happy when my poem is published in a magazine or website

 I appreciate all the positive aspects and problems faced in every house by every member of our club in their respective houses during the ongoing pandemic. It is also a fact that no house can be perfect. What I am going to say today is no recipe to prescribe dos and don'ts for any house. Members of my esteemed club may not agree with my opinion. My humble experience of decades as a poetess, my views about the house in the ongoing pandemic are something different from what my other club members expressed today. I very humbly want to submit that no matter how well-organised are rooms, balconies verandas are in one's house, life is good at home in the ongoing pandemic when it gets converted to a home. In my opinion, this is possible only when things are sorted in mind(where we keep things messy) of every member residing in a particular house. Many times, I have experienced that if any member of a particular household keeps feelings like regret, expectation, secrets, worries, comparisons,  jealousy, complexes in their mind and heart, the mood of that particular household is different.There are feelings of insecurity and uncertainty in the atmosphere of that house. Friends, though these things look minor, they play a very important role in converting a house into a homestay during the ongoing pandemic. For sure, if not taken care of with respect to time, the house will have some sort of mess in spite of all the physical comforts available in the house. I have been a student of science. Vibration in quantum physics means everything is energy. Any feeling causes one to emit a vibration that can be positive or negative. To become a source of inspiration for youngsters specially in pandemic time, one should try to emit positive vibrations in their surroundings

 My humble submission, friends, is, to convert a house into a real home during the pandemic, we must try to practice keeping away from anger, regret, ego problems, and not expecting too much from each other as far as possible. Avoid thinking that so and so is happier than me. In difficult times like a pandemic, do every activity with good, positive intentions in mind, which simply means housekeeping starts from ourselves self that too from our mind. In our real home ours we no doubt outsource housekeeping, which is a good practice, but it is not complete to make our house –real home. We must carry out every activity in a simple, straightforward manner with good intentions and a clear mind. We must listen to our hearts and keep doing the activity of charity to help our souls. Since feelings speak louder than words. When each member of the family think and acts so, things in the house will roll automatically with time, and the dynamics of a real  home will become examples of inspiration for others to live in a real home during the pandemic.

 

Dr Sukarma Rani Thareja,

Associate Professor-Retired

CSJM University

Alumnus IIT-K-1986

KANPUR , UP

INDIA

Pl read-

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Home Maker Scientist

 My mom is a brilliant homemaker,

She thinks like a scientist,

She keenly  observes animal earth and sky,

She asks good questions to me, wondering,

how and what and why,

she makes smart guesses,

hypothesizing what might happen and when.

She does cool experiments also while cooking and housekeeping,

sometimes she tests my scientific thinking also by asking many,

smart questions to me, which makes me think deeply,

That also clears my fundamentals about life.

She makes the best use of a smart smartphone,

She records pictures of nature and cooking procedures,

She thinks all through that she has done in a day,

concluding what she should have done,

wondering, asking, trusting and concluding;

is a way of her simple and graceful life,

This is what scientists also do.

My mother tells me,

If you want to be a woman scientist, you must do what I do,

I ask myself why my mother is called just a homemaker,

Doesn’t she deserve the title of scientist-home maker?

By Sukarma Rani Thareja

https://sites.google.com/site/drsukarmaranithareja/home

Return Gift

 For every child birthday celebration is an occasion to look forward to. At every age, children have something special that they love to eat, for example, pizza, potato chips, and cupcakes are their favourite staples. These eatables have hardly any nutrition in them.

It's ok to give children some special experiences at their birthday party. But overemphasizing material gifts or return gifts does not add any new experience to children who have come to the party for fun. 

Looking back at the landfill of plastic return gifts, the only things that stand out are that children play with them for a while, and those return gifts become plastic garbage. Are we really ready for all this? Please do ask yourself this question too. The answer is a big "no".

The moral of the story is that friends for a child's birthday party are for fun, and let us not decrease its fun part by adding a return 

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Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK 1986

India

Why value time

  Time is most precious parameter of life.

Spend time with yourself.

Please donot chase people,

Who do not respect you.

This way you are wasting  time.

Remember  "Stich in time saves nine".

Sense of time helps you in making

achievements  in life.

Respect your time

Respect others time also.

Time is a great healer.

Time is a great teacher.

Time is biggest factor in,

Disciplined  life.

Perfect timing in life,

Brings lot of joy in life.

Sukarma Thareja 

https://sites.google.com/site/drsukarmaranithareja/home

People Action

 We have a joint family.    We have a helper, Asha buaji, in our house. She is an elderly lady and walks with a little limp. But that does not slow her down in helping with the activity. Actually, Asha bua is present everywhere.

There are nine kids in our house. Asha bua knows the grades of every kid in our house. She keeps track of the classes of every kid at home. She keeps instructing the cook at home to hurry up with the food so that nobody gets late for the office or school.

I don’t remember a time when I came home and always saw Asha bua doing something or other. In and never saw BuA sitting idle. She was always full of energy. She is a shoulder to cry on. A friendly ear to listen to kids' emotional problems. She is a gentle reminder to kids when they make a mistake or neglect their studies. She sees to it that elders are never without coffee, despite the occasional absence of raw coffee in our house. She is excellent at managing things.

Now I am away from home. I remember all those motherly traits of Asha bua. When I think of her, her limp is not the first thing that comes to mind. Her wrinkles seem an important part of her beauty. All I remember is her heart and the immense love she had for all of us. All I remember is her radiant smile when we called out"Asha Bua."

The moral of the story is friends People’s actions make them beautiful. And yes, my  Asha bua is supremely beautiful 

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Sukarma Thareja 

Time Sprctrum Dimension of Life

 Life is like a dream. Sometimes one faces realities in life that correlate with one's dreams. It is possible to keep one's realities of life in one line, like a spectrum of light. End of reality of one's life is a "very difficult life "best example is the life of home maker managing everything to make home comfortable. 

The other end of the spectrum of life is" easy life" best example is the life of a drunk person. 

Along with the spectrum of life, one gets a chance to peep into many dimensions of life. Some of them, which I happen to peep into, are listed below. 

My friends who is saints, peeping into his life, make me feel that I should donate everything materialistic in life. 

My friend, who is a political leader, peeping into his life makes me feel that whatever I have studied so far is useless

My friend, who is a businessman, peeping into his life, makes me feel that I have earned very little money in my life. 

My friend, who is a scientist, peeing in his life makes me feel that all the evils I have in life are because I have too little knowledge. 

My friend who is an army personnel, peeping into his life, makes me feel that I have made too less sacrifices in my life. 

My good friend, peeping into any person's life, makes me feel I am the happiest person in life.

 

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Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

Visiting Kanpur as traveller

 In my social science classes we have many times read about travelers visiting India from China and Gulf countries. We were very happy to know that how culturally rich is my country that many travelers visited our country.

My brother happen to get admission in IITK. To meet my brother in Kanpur we stayed in small resort in Kanpur.

My brother had many good things to be told to us about Kanpur. As brother was staying in Kanpur he always visited Kanpur city as tourist. He saw Bhaitoor temple near Ganga river very special. He used to admire Kanpur Thiago laddo which we ate many times.

But when we stayed in small restore in Kanpur we were travelers not tourist. We could see fine life of Kanpur. Everywhere tea stall with lot of samosa was pleasant experience. But inspite all humbleness people chewing paan will pitch out peak every where. Kanpur people always exhibited less sense of hygiene.

Vegetables hawkers will not care about keeping vegetables in clean way.

Leather factories of Kanpur will not hesitate to put factory waste in ganga river.

These were observations we as travelers observed in Kanpur. My brother was in IITK, he visited Kanpur city as tourist therefore he could not see fine things of Kanpur life.

Moral of story is when one is exploring outside city it is better to visit as traveler not as tourist. That knowledge makes one more mature and thoughtful. 

Student Teacher and Researcher

 I was waiting for my bus, to go home from school.As luck would have it I happen to meet three old students of my school at bus stop.I was very happy to meet my students after a long time gap.

Naresh was school teacher,Rakesh was student in college in Delhi ans was working for his B.Sc degree.Mahesh was working as research scientist in govt lab-NPL in Delhi.

I along with my three students went for cup of tea in school canteen.Their was very fruitful discussion among four of us.I am listing salient point of conclusion of discussion below.

Naresh said it is possible for a person to be a good teacher but not a good student or researcher. Being a good teacher requires different skills and abilities than being a good student or researcher.

Rakesh said A good teacher is someone who can effectively communicate information to others, motivate students to learn, and create a positive learning environment. They are also able to adapt their teaching methods to meet the needs of their students.

Mahesh said A good student is someone who is able to learn new information quickly and efficiently, and who is able to apply that information to new situations.They are also able to think critically and solve problems. A good researcher is someone who is able to conduct original research, and who is able to communicate their findings to others. They are also able to think creatively and come up with new ideas.

I concluded the discussion- the skills and abilities required for each of these roles are different, so it is possible for someone to be good at one role but not the others. For example, someone who is a good teacher may not be a good student because they may not be as motivated to learn new information on their own. Similarly, someone who is a good researcher may not be a good teacher because they may not be as good at communicating information to others.

Moral of story is friends It is important to remember that there is no one “right” way to be a teacher, a student, or a researcher. Everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses, and it is important to be in a role that plays to ones 

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Sukarma Thareja 

Slow Down Mode of Life

 

At one phase of my teaching journey, one of my students asked me, "Madam some sometimes we students are caught in the company of negative people -friends and coworkers, who try to tear down our dreams. How to handle that peculiar situation. Please share some experiences if possible".

 I  advised my students, "friends, at that phase of life when nothing is going right in one's life, the best is to be grounded or slow down. Slowing down is a unique form of #meditation. Breathing in and out with gratitude towards the mighty gives one unique strength."

I further said" from my personal experience of life as a woman, home maker and teacher I can say, accepting slow down mode in difficult phase of life is a #conscious choice."

My friend  Asha said, "Spiritual activity like  #pranayam and surya namskar early morning in slow down mode of life makes one's footsteps meet Mother Earth, who gives her energy with reverence to the person who is in slow down mode."

I further said, "Mother Earth supplies energy and  makes the body and soul of a person slow down mode  positive and fills one with a lot of fresh energy."

 Sita said, "Not only does one get focused on what makes one #happy. But one becomes #fearless and worries less also. A person seeks their biggest commitment in the journey of life. One's mind, body and soul can now fight any negative battle of life. One can handle a negative personality with a lot of #ease."

I further  said, "Hence, friends opting for  slow down mode at the right time in life journey gives positive energy, which is very #important and sometimes does miracles in handling negative  situations of life."

Moral -Never be hesitant to go into slow-down mode at the time of need.

Slow down mode at any phase of life makes one efficient and full of positive energy

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Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK 1986

India

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Sports Teaching

 Sports is not only fitness,

Fitness is small part of sports ,

Sports teaches you how to loose ,

No other activity teaches you so ,

May be working for company  ,

May be working for super house,

May be you are home maker,

You can't afford to loose sports 

sports gives you another,

 Chance even If you loose,

 Sports teaches,

You collaboration ,

Even if it is individual game  ,

You need coach ,

That means collaboration,

Therefore friends,

Educators,

Make sports integral part of

Curriculum.

 Respected woman folks,

You share,

Responsibility of home,

 And work front ,

Please make sports ,

Part of your routine,

 Friends sports will make 

You strong  ,

By giving you ,

Another chance ,

Which will make you ,

Integrated to world,

Even if you loose 

You will have the courage  , 

Even when time ,

 Is not with you .

Sukarma Thareja 

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Please Take out Time

 Take out time for your day to day activities  of life,

This is a promise for successful  life ,

Take out time for doing playing activities in life ,

This is secret to remain young,

Take out time for reading writing activities   ,

This is foundation  to your knowledge.,

Take out time for positive  social activities  ,

This is foundation  to happiness  in life.

Take out time for positive  dreams in life.

This will  make you know  your goals of life,

Take out some time to do free activities in life,

This is music of soul ,

Time of your life is Gold.

Time spent in life creats history,

Coming time in life is uncertain  ,

Present time in life is precious  gift ,

Enjoy and value your present time in life.

Sukarma Thareja 

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Woman anti to Woman

 My son was an intern in one of the biggest hospitals in India. He was posted in Haryana state. As we all know, Haryana is famous for female foeticide. So much so that the sex ratio is 900  females to 1000 males.

My son's friend Suresh used to visit our house. It so happened that he was from Haryana. Jokingly, he will tell me," Dear aunty, I can not get a good match to marry, as the girl who was destined to marry me was killed in the female foeticide drive of Haryana." I used to feel sad for him, but I had no courage to express my sadness in front of him.

My son was posted in Haryana as an intern, and at 2.30 in the night, a woman came with labor pains.

The protocol demands that the doctor on duty do a per vaginal examination and decide whether to admit or refer, depending upon the effacement/dilatation of the cervix/previous history.

The woman was in labor, accompanied by her mother-in-law and sister in law at 2.30 in the night. My son was the only doctor on duty, and their first demand was  - they want a female doctor.

When they realized that my son was the only doctor on duty, they finally agreed to have an examination done by my son.

The woman in labor was sufficiently dilated, and my son asked the nurses to admit her.

 It was her first child. As luck would have it, the woman gave birth to a girl child.

Their concerned faces(the mother-in-law and her sister), who only wanted a female doctor to examine her, suddenly turned upside down. They told my son, ‘If it were a male child, it would have been less painful for the mother with the labor pains and less painful for us too.’

The same mother-in-law and sister in law who were refusing her(the woman with labour pain) to be examined by a male doctor(my son) and wanted a female doctor to examine their daughter-in-law, now suddenly were sad that she gave birth to a female child.

My son told me above above-listed story. I at once remember dear Suresh, my son's good friend

I immediately thanked God for being so nice to this universe and for creating males and females in equal numbers.I am so worried that if this equal ratio is distorted, what will happen to this universe? God only knows

Sukarma Thareja

 Alumnus IITK 1986

India

 

Is your Science Lab Clean or Tidy

 We had cleanliness drive in our school.I with help of my students andhelper got my chemistry lab cleaned snd made it tidy also.

After  a week I asked my students to write down difference between Tidy lab and clean lab. Students came with many answers the best one I am listing below.

Tidy lab means everything has a place, and everything like apparatus buret

-pippets are in their respective places. Like reagent bottles used for testing cations and anions of inorganic salt must go to side shelves of lab. 

While acid and bases bottles will be in front shelf of lab.Countertops are empty, tables only have what belongs on it, towels are tobe hanged on each working table.

On the other hand lab can be perfectly tidy but dirty. 

Towels need in the laundry, countertops are dirty, lab table is sticky with reagent trips.

One need soap and water and mop and vacuum. One should tidy the lab before the cleaning people come so they can clean, mop, vacuum, shampoo carpet,and scrub the shower. 

Sukarma Thareja 

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Try to Learn Maximum from environment

 I was studying in prestigious college.The biggest thing I observed that we all students were living  in an incredibly competitive world and were all on the same track in some kind of race, somehow competing for the same thing.

 Nobody knew what that thing is, but somehow high grades and going to an expensive college are supposed to get us there.

After I graduated from college I realised that the truth is, the world is not that competitive. My observation is that people who know how to cooperate, to help others rather than worry excessively about their own achievement, are often the happiest and most successful, by any reasonable measure of success.

When I was studying in college I always thought   that there is a great advantage in getting into an elite, expensive, hard-to-get-into college.

I found this is myth. The myth was because  a failure on the part of people who should know better to distinguish between correlation and causation.

Yes, going to a prestigious college correlates with getting a prestigious job and high income later on in life, but that doesn’t mean that going to the prestigious college is in any way the cause of such success . One should take advantage of facilities, good faculty members teaching and good students coming to that college and try to learn maximum from environment provided by college and work on ones personality building .

These learnings will help individual in one way or other. These learning experiences correlates to ones successful happy life. 

Life Quote Sukarma Thareja

 Life is a journey of experiments. Some are successful, some are partially successful, but all add to wisdom. 

Sukarma Rani Thareja

People on a mission never count their work. They enjoy their work till their last breath and inspire generations. 

Sukarma Rani Thareja