Younger people not satisfied generation

 Other day I was talking to my old students.I asked them why you all seem to be not satisfied with your life. One student said rightly that this is because we compare with what we could have become and what we are today right now,that makes us feel frustrated.

Yes I also agreed with students that  a generation ago, people had choice of only one TV channel and practically one or two products on each category. Today, one has virtually unlimited choices in everything.

Even in the personal life, once choices of spouse were earlier limited based on your caste, religion, region or nationality. Today, one can select anyone as ones partner.

When one has too many choices, one get confused and even more frustrated because when one is not satisfied with what one choose, one curse oneself for making the bad choice and feel frustrated.

Other student explained that modern world is the most materialistic in the history of mankind.

It does not matter who one is.

What matters most is what one has. 

How much one earn?

How good looking one is.

How good looking ones spouse is.

Which car one drive.

How big ones house is.

How much ones income is.

The problem with materialistic way to life is that one feel always inadequate in one or more areas since there is always someone better than one in every area. Hence, instead of feeling happy what one has, one is unhappy because other have more.

Moral of story is to never compare one self with other in materialistic world. There is no end to it. If one gets involved in such materialistic world too much one will always be dissatisfied. 

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

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Mother Day Celebration Every Day

 In India every day is mothers day. I have been living in joint family. Many of my close friends are home maker. Thay are blessed with children. Taking care of children is demanding exercise. I have seen some moms struggling for every second, as some time mom has to prepare breakfast and same time children demand  that they should be  nursed by mom with milk.

Poor mom get confused. She get to think which activity to do first. As both activities are equally important. 

 We know electron,  they sometimes behave like   particle and some times  electrons behave as waves. I wish mother was also given mystical power like electrons that she could be available for two big events at the same time. That perhaps would made motherhood more easy. But reality is not so. 

Best way to celebrate mother’s Day -ideally, is may be we can work on creating a world where moms have so much support from their partners and family year-round that when it comes around to their special day of celebration, they don’t have to ask for time to go to the bathroom or catch up on sleep. Maybe at that point, they’ll want some flowers. She will be grateful to all persons who so ever help her in making her mother journey duties smooth. 

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

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Students to be like Sun---Not Moon

 I was teaching in college. I was very particular about lab report submission for students. This whole exercise I used to do for students to discipline them. 

I found most of my students believed in copying experiment observation reading from other student. The confidence that one can do oneself was some how missing. I am happy I was able to mend students habit of copying up to 60 percent. But alas still some students were not ready to come out of their shell of depending upon others for their work. 

Once I was talking to students I told them that many of you don’t  like my habit of being so particular about submission of lab reports. 

But friends moral of story is you see Sun every day shining with his own light, but moon has to take light from sun to shine. In other words moon is dependent on sun. That’s why moon always never shine with same intensity. It is better one try to become Sun in life rather than moon. So student your teacher is happy to see her students as Sun in life rather than moon. 

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

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Starting Late in activities of Passion

 I am persistence person and believes  and lives in the glass-half-full analogy  well. Interestingly, I am met with a mixture of kudos and disbelief by my age peers when I reveal my new endeavor of science arts writing to them. 

 Since doing work from home is especially suited for seniors like me,,it only stands to reason that as I do bit of writing every day as blog in blogger.com. No one knows how old I am as I am  online, and the chance of ageist reactions and rejections shrinks exponentially.

 The goofy ideas of science arts characters, colors, and moody sounds that have resided within me since I was a teen are still there, and I am finally unleashing them on the world through my writin one by one. It’s a number game. Social media has become second nature to me.

 I think about it this way: What was once considered boastful is now called “self-marketing.” If you don’t put your intentions out there, no one will notice you or even value the wealth of talent that occupies your innards. I figure I can’t give myself the understanding  of hoping to be “discovered.” I have to make this little dream happen, just as I did when I submitted a science arts writing sample to different science magazine editors. Many time my writing were accepted for publication. That encouraged me to write and till today I am involved in science arts writing. 

Now I write blog on blogger.com and name of my blog is “sukarma musing”.

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

Changing Work Track

 My friend Gita started her teaching career as science teacher in school.When her children grew up she took study leave and went fir P. hd program.She taught in college and got actively involved in research work. Since science subjects need lab for higher education.Gita was maintaining her research lab also along with teaching assignment.She was feeling very much stressed out. 

After her  retirement Gita was looking for work environment that doesn’t stress her out. 

When one is young, a high-pressure work environment can feel challenging. As we slog through the years in ones career, that sensation usually transforms into stress.

 If ones high-stress career is taking a toll on ones health or relationships, one should not feel sorry about looking for a healthier work environment.

My friend Gita did same after retirement. She started doing science arts writing and published many good poems in good science magazine. She is happy in writing that keeps her mentally occupied at the same time full of energy. 

Moral of story is friends don’t feel hesitant to alter ones track of activities after retirement. Follow that track which one always wished to follow but somehow was not able to do so. 

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

Helping Unmotivated Children

 I was teaching in school.Our principal madam requested me to help unmotivated kids if possible in subject mathematics.I agreed to her request.Every Saturday morning I used to teach under-privileged kids(unmotivated) mathematics in a my school. 

Upto my surprise children were not  interested in studying maths.  I’d explain to them why they should be -studying maths. 

What maths could mean for their lives specialy when it world of digital technology– and I made it clear that I was giving up my precious weekend, without pay, to help them so that they could clear their doubt in maths. 

I also told kids that I couldn’t help them if they didn’t want to help themselves. And so if they did not want to learn maths they could go to the nearby cafe and chill.

A couple of students did take the cafe option, but not for long.  

I have successfully used the same techniques on my own kids. I have never forced them to study. Instead, I have given them reasons to study, made it clear it’s their lives which are at stake, not mine.

In fact, a few months ago my 11-year-old daughter told me she wanted to play football full-time and drop academic study altogether! After trying to convince her, I eventually backed down.

Why let her do something that I am confident is a really bad choice? 

The next day she dropped the idea and got back to studying.

Moral of story is to teach unmotivated kids one should explain clearly what’s at stake and give kids ownership of their own lives. The rest is down to them…

This experiment I did as teacher as well as being mother. For me it was successful experiment  in both cases and results were reasonably good. 

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

Unhealthy Food-Corrupt Life

 I used to teach my Students formula of leading healthy life?

1.Take the food that is nutritious and healthy and avoid the food which have more calories, fat and spices

2.Do workout daily by engaging in any physical activities like walking, swimming, exercising etc.

I used to tell my students,fact of life is that there are hardly any food which is healthy as well as tasty.

The unhealthier is the food, the more tasty and tempting it is

Hence, one end up eating the unhealthy food because  and spoiling ones health.

2.student everyone of you know the benefits of physical exercise. One not only maintain good body shape by such exercise but also prevent many diseases like diabetes, heart attack by such lifestyle.

Yet we fail to lead a healthy lifestyle because these activities don’t bear fruits immediately. They are painful by nature till you develop a habit of suffering such pain and start loving it.

What is true for health is also true for happiness in life.

The illegal activities like corruption, crimes, frauds, provides instant benefits and therefore appears very tempting. No wonder that people fall for them knowing fully well their evil effects on them.

One the other hand the ethical values like integrity, honesty, truthfulness, faithfulness does not provide any instant fruits and takes several years to bear the fruit some time in this birth or next birth. People are confused if it true that one has to bear consequences if they are corrupt. 

Moral of story is that  one should understand implications of corrupt life,unhealthy food and unhealthy life style of life. To some it seems to be mystery of life.But believe my friends it is not mystery but it is truth of life.We can perhaps avoid most of our suffering and live a great life.

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

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Daily Diary writing

 When started teaching,I started writing diary. I just wanted to introspect activities of my whole day. That diary writing enlightened me and made me better person and in a way a better teacher.

I found that sometimes I do things  that create problems for myself… 

Some of activities which creat problems for me I sm listing them below. 

Sometimes  in occasionally gossip I use words which I should not have used.In the process I regretted using harsh words. 

2.I stayed up late scrolling social media and waked up exhausted. 

3.Sometimes I have  bigger regrets—people I have harmed whether I intended to or not—that cause mr to lose sleep or feel ashamed

The concept of Right Action, the first of the ethical principles b is outlined by the Buddha.  In short, I strive to behave ethically by avoiding harm to ourselves or others. I wish to accomplish this through mindful restraint in our thoughts, actions, and words.

I also have found that engaging in good behavior—such as cooperation, and caregiving—increases my well-being. 

Moral of story is friends diary writing to introspect ones action is very good way to improve oneself. 

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK 

India

Scrap Dealer-Wisdom

 When I was studying in school we used to get two newspaper daily, One english and one hindi and one weekly magazine in English. These purchases were important as our parents wanted us to have strong general knowledge and command over language english and hindi. After two months we used to sell all old news papers and weekly magazine to scrab dealer Radhe. 

Some time Radhe will be late in coming, but still we will wait for him to collect old magazine from our house. 

We got our house white washed. We had made small temple in our house where all family members will worship collectively. As mark of respect to God we had put many good photos of Lord Krishna. Vishnu ji and mahabharat photographs to remind preaching of bhagvad  Gita to kids. After white wash we removed old photos  of all God’s in our temple and pasted new ones. 

My mother collected all old photos of all respected God and tied it with bundle of news paper. Scrap dealer Radhe came he collected bundle of newspaper but he refused to collect old photos of all hindu Gods. 

When my mother asked Radhe reason for doing so. He very humbly replied that madam may be you have capabilities to Sell God. But this poor Radhe has no capacity to buy God. 

Moral of story is God is supreme power. No body can sell God. No body can buy God. So friends always be humble. Worship God and thank him for every thing he has given us. 

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

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Over Thinking

 have a sister she is principal of school, like many hard-working professionals, she enjoys developing herself and others. She also adores diving into new ideas and is energized by consuming information.

This ability to take in and process the world more deeply is particularly strong in the type of professionals who identify as what are—high achievers who think and feel everything more deeply.

As a sensitive person my sister has many strengths. Sensitive persons like my sister tend to be perceptive, observant, empathetic, and conscientious. Her sensitivity, combined with her drive to succeed, is what makes her a powerhouse performer.

On the other hand, because of  depth of processing, sensitive person often struggle to halt overthinking, or the tendency to think too much or too long about a subject. 

While  my sister is sensitive person is often applauded for the way she explores different angels of different problems.This over thinking pushes her into doubt and indecision.

 Worst of all sometimes her work bled into her personal time, and my sister has trouble “shutting off” her brain at night.

Here are several strategies I shared with my sister that can help anyone who is struggling with over thinking. 

Naming ones patterns of overthinking and then reframing them helps improve ones perspective so that one can see new possibilities and find solutions instead of hitting mental dead . 

How to reframe: Look for nuance in situations. When ones mind presents only two forks in the road, slow down, and ask if one might be missing some options.

One must reframe problems  Stop using extreme words like “always,” “never,” “all” and “every.” Treat events in isolation; just because something happened once doesn’t mean it will happen again.

Whenever one find oneself lost in unhelpful thoughts, one can use a pattern interruption technique to ease one self out of an overthinking spiral. 

Visualize one worries or fears as floating away in a balloon or drifting away down a stream. 

Friends reframing problems of over thinking and pattern recognition in over thinking are strong tools one can use to halt over thinking in day to day life. 

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

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Decisions-Time

 I was teaching in school. Some of my friends they will always say they do not have iota time. 

I agree that school teaching if one does sincerely is difficult job. 

But one has to plan things in life and take decisions at right time. Some of my friends will not take decisions at right time if it is personal or professional level decisions. I agree some decisions are really difficult. They can be bad also. But if one takes decisions fast one land up saving lot of time. 

But bad decisions teaches one life lessons and make one wise. So please don’t afraid of taking decisions. 

Moral of story is friends take decisions in life at right time and please dont be afraid of taking decisions. They are part of life process and teaches one great wisdom. 

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

 

Magic Doors of Home

 From childhood on wards I saw when ever my father went of home my mother will not close doors immediately.Sometime father will forget something and will come back after a while. He will pass smile to my mother oh! I forgot something.My mother will pass back smile to my father. 

Once I asked my mother why don’t you close door immediately if someone goes for work from home. My mother told mr”If our dear one going for work at far off place then we should not leave hope, we should wait for him to come back home till last moment of our life.These hopes and confidence remove distance between relationship.”

Moral of story is due to differences of opinion there are disagreements between near snd dear ones, but they are temporary issues of life. One should forgo them and always keep doors of hearts open. So that one could come in at our home without hesitations.

Sukarma Thareja

Alumnus IITK

India

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